alright for those of you who don't know, i am moving. not permanently, but i am tired of being stuck at home. so when an oppurtunity to teach english in the czech republic (formerly of czechoslovakia) popped up, i decided to act on it. so yea, come september 20ish i will be gone. i dont wanna type more about it here so you either have to comment on it or ask me directly.
anyway, its a lot of weird feelings. glad to be going, glad to be leaving, glad to be doing something strange, but damn...hesitant lately.
for those of you who know me you might be asking, well what about carly? yea, i know. i hate that part.
if you do know me or more importantly us, then it might really seem strange. it is. it pains me to even think about it. it could be possibly the stupidest thing ive ever done.
but why then? well, i can make myself feel better by saying these were wheels set in motion long before she came and colored my life. but that's inconsequential because i am not the same person i was before i met her. so why then? well, i don't have a job anywhere else, that's another easy way out. but no, i dunno. i don't feel like i can stay. she never expected me to come and change her plans. how bad would i feel, and how much would i lose if i hung around, and threw her into a situation she doesn't feel like she wants? i feel i might be in the way.
and compare that to how good it would feel to see her smile again and touch her hand.
thinkin about that makes me all bubbly inside. must be the clouds in my eyes.

currently jammin: Elton John - Daniel (dig that first beat!)